This is what my bedroom looks like right now. Right now there is a 32″ deep shower stall just hanging out in 2 pieces. Just hanging out. Why? Because it’s goal is to stress me out – and I think it’s winning. Now, you may be wondering how I ended up in this predicament. Let me back up a few months. Remember that time I announced I was going to Ecuador this month? Well, about that same time, we decided to replace my old (i.e. original to the bathroom) metal shower stall. And, knowing how much it would stress me out to have to deal with people in my space, construction, the issues that arise from construction, and everything that goes along with that process, I decided Dad could have it all done while I was out of the country – and then I wouldn’t have to deal with it. I’d leave to the old shower and come home to a brand new shower. Simple, right?
Wrong. Clearly I did not get my neurotic planning and anxiety from my father – because, even though he knew this needed to be done – and he knew months ago – he failed to plan any….ANY… of it until last weekend. And so – discovering this – and feeling that it might be a good idea to have a shower to replace the old one, I agreed to go with Dad to Home Depot to pick out & bring home the new base. It wasn’t until we got it home that he began to doubt the thing would fit up the stairs to my bathroom.
And so, when I expected to be able to avoid the stress of this new shower, I find myself knee deep in it. Thankfully, we have a helpful neighbor who offered his assistance in getting the shower unit up the stairs – and, in an effort to keep my own sanity, I left the house while they dismantled the door frame, handrail, and bottom carpeted step to make room for the shower. I left mad – and it still frazzles me a bit. In fact, until I sat down to write this post, I was still very deeply frustrated at the entire situation.
But in writing, I started thinking. I was horribly angry at how stressed the situation made me on my last “free” day before my trip. But how selfish is that? I am blessed beyond measure – and yet, I sit angry at my blessing? I am getting a new shower. A shower that will not leak, and will provide me with fresh water a mere 9 steps from my bed. I have a healthy father who wants to provide me with the new shower, and who will oversee its installation while I am away. I have kind neighbors who offered their help and skills. I am blessed. And so, no, the situation is not as I had hoped it would be. But it will be alright. There is no way that this stress is in any way beneficial to me – or to my trip. So, instead of focusing on the stress, I’m going to remember blessing of being in Hot Water, and acknowledge that this is just the Devil’s way of messing with me in an attempt to close my heart to further blessings.
So this is me, sitting at the computer, typing these words, and acknowledging the stress. And this is me telling the stress to stand aside, because I am committing to enjoying the trip, being open to blessings, and enjoying the process. This shower mess is simply the “can’t find a flight” of this trip. And if that’s any indication, I’m in for a beautiful ride.